原来

i choose this topic as i saw it randomly from dunno where..
juz to type some craps bt couldnt think of the topic of this post..
suddenly moody come strike my mind..
i dunno y la~! i juz dun wanna be emo god back..
wakaka.

wad happen today.. boring duh! dunno wad to do for the whole day..
maths... i always fall asleep la..
how! i cant concentrate.. =(
how to study at home... i cant.. =(
i very stress n many problems will occur if i din score well in my first exam!
i m worried..
wad to do!!!! no one can help anyway!

boring!

i m trying to relate this post to the title..
wakaka. bt i dunno how..
原来，我不是一个好男人。
原来，我一点也不了解。
原来，我还是那么的幼稚。
原来，我。。。

-engleong-

bad day!!!!

wad a bad day for me!
today.. assembly was freaking boring as i m nt really energetic n feel blur at all time..
went to assembly bt skipped lines!
went thr to pass sanjivan YEE CHANG name tag..
funny duh~ guy wearing a girl's name tag..
==

anyway.. assembly passed fast n i was worrying about the next class..
its MUET!! speaking test duh!
i thought i can do it well..
bt the first BAD thing happened...
teacher actually cant really hear my points n she said i nvr link my points to the topic...
i feel disappointed n i gt low marks for that..
onli 28! oh no! bt luckily teacher gave us a chance tro resit for it! IF she gt time..
read properly! IF u know.. nt comfirm yet....

maths! the next bad thing happened...
u know wad.. maths is actually nt that hard if i can concentrate during Mr Tham class..
i fall asleep during his class.. bt i forced myself to open my eye instead of 'fishing'..
i din learn anything during his class..

haiz... sad things juz cant leave me alone..
they juz come attack attack n attack at all time..
went to staff room to look for Mr mazlan..
i went thr for so many days bt still.. He is so busy until i cant meet him once during in these 5 days!
hate it!

finally.. skul finish n i thought i can have a nice CLU meeting..
bt somehow.. theen meng brings me a VERY good news!
i juz cant accept the fact.. n i dunno how to handle it..
i agreed with wad he says.. bt however.. read the following paragraph later~ to be continued in this topic..

went to TS to find Khai hsuen n pei wern with Chloe..
thx Chloe for accompanying me.. otherwise i think i will bored til i die...
reached TS Mcdonald....
saw them..
n go sit together with them..
khai hsuen really kelian as he is totally palau by pei wern n one of her frens.
they was talking non stop until khai hsuen finish the two large packs of french fries..
salute PEI WERN! wakaka..
so much saliva de mie??
finally she gave me some ideas on the bfday presents..

ask khai hsuen n chloe to accompany me to buy the presents..
i spent 3 hours to find for it!
omg! i ju can think of anything to buy for her..
i suddenly feel look down on myself..
onli khai hsuen n chloe know why~
suddenly down at that moment..
n finally bought something which is nt very special...
bt i hope u will like it.. it is very cheap..
i dunno wad to buy.. as dear knows.. i dun like to shopping bt i walked 3 hours.. wakaka..
i juz nt satisfy with wad i bought.. bt i really cant think of anything to buy for u...
eng hong took my first choice's present for u.
n i cant have the another one which is look better than that~
i m sad!

next.. sorry n thx khai hsuen for sending me to pasar seni.. bt in a results of making u get scolded by ur mum.. n summore.. the staff is closed...
i was like == when i reached thr.! FUCK!
another bad thing!!!!!
today really freaking unlucky u know! wad the fuck happen to me today!!!!!!!!

went home.. thought to get some support from my family about wad theen meng told me juz now..
bt in a results of get scolded by them too..
2 brothers n my mum keep talking non stop n make me freaking annoy...
i was freaking tired ady.. n they nvr think of my feeling..
i dunno wad to do... wad u all expect me to do...
i juz wanna do something i like.. bt u all stopped me..

n then.. wads next! this is totally bring my mood to the down-est part...
wad is that!??
huh!!!!!!!!!! i hate it!
i planned to go her skul to meet her tomolo..
bt wad eng hong told me is!! :'' eh, tomolo also the same.. 4 o clock u need to reach titiwangsa... i need u to go UM with me.. den bring mama home..''
wad the fuck! cant u juz tell me be4 i planned all this thing.. n now u ask me find another day to go? i m totally down becuz of this u know!
haiz.. things juz dun go well with me today!

my mood is totally spoilt because of my stuides n my family..
luckily my dear is with me always.. nvr leave me alone..
bt the last thing i mentioned really brought me to the deepest part of hell! i m freaking sad n angry! i juz cant calm myself when i think about it...

bye... mood down...
i need ur console n comfort..
can u call me?

-engleong-

sorry~

i shuldnt off my phone today..
i m so freaking stupid.. i m nt around u when u need me..
i m pissed becuz of myself..
i juz cant do wad i had promised u..
*i broke our emo promise
*i broke my sleep earlier promise
*i broke my rest more promise
lastly
*i broke my always around u promise.

i juz cant forgive myself..
how can i break so many promises..
i wont gv any excuse to my own self anymore.

i wish i could be like last time.. so weak.. can cry out loud easily..
why cant i juz cry now..
no one will know.. how i feel now..
even mayb u oso wont understand..
things are so complicated..

lastly,
dear! sorry~
i cant accompany u when u really need me..
n i really hurt..
when u said:'now i dun feel like find u ady'
i m totally down.. down n down..
T.T
finally.. in the end of this post..
i cried!
teardrops on keyboard...

i cant forgive myself! stupid ENGLEONG

-engleong-

its already 9 o clock

its already 9 o clock..
bt i haven received any messages from u..
r u sleeping?
r u studying?
r u having dinner?

i do not know... =(

where r u? worrying so much!
i really scare u dun want to bother me anymore since that day..
n i dun want u to do that on me anymore..
u know u r important in my life!

however.. wad i post about is all passed..
bcuz... u sms-ed me when i wanna start posting this post..
dunno i shuld feel happy or sad now!
haha! very complicated feeling..
juz to release my sadness in blogging way!

thats all

-engleong-

maxwell singing comp~

yesterday was maxwell singing competition
i was kinda exciting with it!
becuz i know many VICLU mates are supporting me, jacky n oso theen meng..
well.. let's rock the PARTY!!!

haha.. theen meng's number was number 9.. mine was number 16 n jacky is unlucky 52..
mayb consider lucky to him cuz the rest were singing sad song bt he is the onli one who sing hyper song....
theen meng.. u did well la! dun worry! ur first time n at least u got something..
we blame the mic!!!!

me- to my own advise... try harder next year.. do not gv up! u can do better!!!! blame the PA oso...

jacky- gratz la u! u did well.. we were so hyper yesterday!!!!!

the winning probability for VICLU is 100!!!! woooot~~
happy!!!!

finish... bb

-engleong-

after knowing this from someone

do u all think my singing skill is good???
nt really actually..
there is many ppl so far better than me!
i nvr learn.. i nvr taught by someone, i nvr sing everyday at home!
i juz like to sing~!
haha.. sometimes i felt thing juz goes very funny yet complicated..
u know wad??
if i won the competition can really make someone lose with alot unsatisfaction..
i rather lose it.. this is y i always dun wanna join solo category..! becuz when there are so many famous 'singer' compete on the stage.. bt the trophies are nt belongs to either one of them..
bt someone who is nt popular at all.. or mayb u nvr heard his/her name...
u know wad?? i rather lose the competition than i lose a fren in my life!
this thing does affect my mood.. my mood swings after hearing this!
i dunno can i perform well tomolo for my singing comp!
n summore, it is solo category.

as i said, everyone can sing actually...
n for me.. god gv me a nice voice..
i appreciate it so much.. i juz can sing better than some ppl..
bt NOT all.
there are still many ppl can beat me in singing comp..
y m i trying so hard to get the first place for singing comp..??
seriously.. i nvr think of it.. i dun really give a damn to it!
it is okay if i cant a single place from competition..
i lost be4.. nt that i never lose..
i dun care!!!!

i hope there is really ntg between me n u~!
juz work hard together..
we love to sing.. don't you?
juz do our best for tomolo! no matter who is reading this n did take part in maxwell singing competition..
i will do my best..
i can do my best!!!
n tomolo.. will be~
i HAVE done my best!!!!

-engleong-

fuh~

i dunno y m i so moody now..
really becuz of ntg u know.
bt the feeling is freaking annoying..
that even make ur heart pain..
i think too much today..
stop thinking about bad things..
this will make myself worst..

great~
i dunno y.. everyday around 9 sumthing..
my head is like spinning n my vision very blur..
i feel like i m gonna faint some day~
mayb i slept late yesterday.. or i shuld say.. everyday! haha.
juz went back from my aunt house..
my nephew who juz borned one month ago..
today celebrate his one month's bfday..
actually shuld be tomolo..
today my aunt juz simply cook some foods to serve us..
it is nice though..
went back home after eating since our house is juz nearby..
on9 straight to chat with someone important to me..
haha. bt my moody mood haven recovered la.!!!!
gonna make her gek liao~!!! cham cham.. i m scared~~~
trying to calm down myself..
ok.. this is wad i did next.. blogged!!
n now.. click publish..

bye everyone who is reading my blog..

-engleong-